There are so many things about the world that we’d love to learn. However, some topics are extremely sensitive. So people might feel extremely self-conscious or embarrassed to ask questions about them because they’ll show their ignorance, even if they’re curious. When folks are anonymous, however, they can feel a lot more comfortable doing this.
Redditor u/SlenderBacon449 started up an enlightening thread on r/AskReddit where they urged men to ask women all the things they’ve always wanted to but couldn’t. The women of Reddit, in turn, answered all of their questions. Scroll down to read what these redditors had to share. Their comments are informative. They’re educational. And you might learn something new even if you think you know everything there is to know.
Bored Panda wanted to learn why there are so many people who are ignorant about human biology and sex, so we reached out to Laurie Mintz, Ph.D., sexpert for LELO and the author of Becoming Cliterate. She was kind enough to answer our questions about why these knowledge gaps exist and shed some light on how grownups can get past feeling embarrassed when asking sensitive questions. Read on for our interview with her.
#1QUESTION: What kind of common behavior makes a guy seem creepy or unattractive?
ANSWER 1: Asking sexual questions when you're not very close friends.
ANSWER 2: Throwing too many compliments right off the hop. You can easily turn from a good, nice guy to a creep in less than five seconds.
ANSWER 3: I don't like when men are way too forward, way too fast. Like, hinting at sex or making sexual jokes at me when I've known you for four hours. And acting like they're entitled to my time, like if I don't respond within five minutes. The, 'OK, guess you're not interested,' response is major creep/red flag alert.
ANSWER 4: Telling me to smile.
Image credits: Player_Number3
We asked Dr. Mintz about why so many men seem to have knowledge gaps about sex and biology. She noted that the United States has a very poor sexual education system "where neither women nor men learn about women’s genital anatomy."
"Indeed, our sex education system often covers only women’s internal, reproductive anatomy and ignores sexual pleasure and response, especially among women. On top of this, movies and porn often perpetuate falsehoods about women’s pleasure, with women orgasming from intercourse alone commonly being shown," she explained to Bored Panda.
"The truth is that only a small percentage of women most reliably orgasm from penetration (4–18% depending on the study), and the rest need clitoral stimulation, either alone or coupled with penetration. However, without proper education or a woman telling a man this, there is very little chance he’d learn this on his own."
#2QUESTION: How uncomfortable is it to wear a tampon? How do you know when you have to change it? Do you get some internal sensation that lets you know when it's time to replace it? Do you time it? How do you know?
ANSWER 1: "If you feel a tampon after insertion, something is wrong. The rest is trial and error, but you can't wear a tampon longer than eight hours. Most of my friends make that six hours or less to be safe."
ANSWER 2: "It's only uncomfortable if it's dry; you can tell it's time to change a tampon by how squishy it feels inside. Sometimes we get it wrong. I've thought I needed to change my tampon before, but when I went to tug on the strings it hurt because it was too dry still, so you leave it."
ANSWER 3: "You also tend to change it if it's leaking or when you poop."
Image credits: CaroleBaskinBad
#3QUESTION: With periods is it a gush, a small leak, or more of a drip every so often?
ANSWER 1: All three. And sometimes, it's a clot, which feels like you're passing a hot slug through your orifice. Periods are fun.
ANSWER 2: To give you a more in-depth answer, it depends on the woman AND the period. Contrary to popular belief, a period is not just a period. They can be easy, hard, heavy, painful, absent, light, etc. And most girls have different ones randomly. So, you'll usually bleed the same every cycle, but diet, stress, and hormones can alter it.
For most girls, the first two to three days are the heaviest. This means heavy flows, cramping, and gushing — this usually happens when you sit up or stand up after a long time in one position, and so the blood has pooled in the cervix or back of the vaginal canal and comes gushing forward or out. With tampons, you tend not to have this issue as much, if at all. The later days, it's just a trickle or flow again, but less blood overall.
Image credits: MaoZade-ong
Meanwhile, we also wanted to get Dr. Mintz's thoughts on what could help grownups get past their feelings of embarrassment when asking questions on sensitive topics like sex.
"We live in a culture that bombards us with sexual images, but tells us very little scientifically accurate information about sex. We also get the message, either consciously or unconsciously, that sex is dirty, or taboo, or too private to discuss. However, I promise that it is easier to learn to talk about sex than it is to read minds (or vaginas!)," the expert said.
"And, the research is very clear: couples who communicate about sex have better sex. Also, in research, when asked what is most important to them during intercourse, not one woman mentioned penis size. They mention a partner that cares about their pleasure and makes that clear via communication."
#4QUESTION: What to do when a period stain is showing and you seem oblivious to it?
ANSWER 1: Please tell her. I walked around all DAY in front of 10 guys because I was the only woman and they were all too afraid to tell me.
ANSWER 2: Honestly if I was in this situation, I would be so incredibly and pleasantly surprised if a guy not only came to tell me, but came with a solution. Like a hoodie to tie around my waist or a way provide me with some cover to lessen the embarrassment. I would remember that person gratefully forever, no joke.
Image credits: Bunnyisgod
#5QUESTION: I just wanna know how weird/unsafe women feel if a man is walking behind them in some silent area? Cause I have internal panic attacks thinking "omg is the woman ahead of me feeling uncomfortable" I usually just overtake them but sometimes overtaking might feel like a direct attack from behind so there's that worry too,, what would women prefer men do in such situations ☠️
ANSWER 1: A guy once called out to me, 'Not following you, I promise, just at a really awkward distance behind.' I appreciated that. Often our heads go into overdrive when we're alone, so giving us any kind of signal or message takes things out of potential panic mode. Also giving a lot of space while overtaking, so you're not right next to her as you pass, is reassuring.
ANSWER 2: One night, I was super drunk walking home and saw a girl ahead of me that seemed worried about my presence. I didn't know what to do, so I pretended to call my girlfriend on the phone. She slowed the pace, and I was able to overtake her, but I stumbled in a very goofy way. I heard her chuckle behind me. It was a little embarrassing.
ANSWER 3: I was walking home from the bar one night, totally smashed, and I ended up basically following this gal for like four blocks, and it was starting to get weird because it was like 1 a.m., so drunk me just yelled, ‘Hey I’m walking home and kinda smashed, and we seem like we’re going in the same direction, but if you want me to walk in front so you can watch me and feel safer, that’s totally cool.’ She went from peeking over her shoulder to laughing. We ended up walking together for a few blocks, and turned out she lived two buildings away from me.
Image credits: MoBarbz
#6QUESTION: Do women put deodorant in their boob pits?
ANSWER 1: Or powder of some sort, yes. My underboobs sweat a lot.
ANSWER 2: I do not, but I don’t have extremely large breasts. If your boobs are big enough to hang against your skin, it might make sense to wear powder or something to be more comfortable.
Image credits: 3rdAccountPlsDontBan
According to Dr. Mintz, the information about sexual communication and pleasuring women is out there, but you need to seek it from certified sex therapists instead of porn or movies.
"Great starting places are the books, She Comes First by Ian Kerner, Sizzling Sex by Michael Castleman, and the chapter written in my book, Becoming Cliterate, just for male partners. Indeed, published research shows that men who read the chapter written for them ('Cliteracy for Him') improve their knowledge of women’s genital anatomy and sexual pleasure, as well as their sexual communication skills. They also decrease their endorsement of harmful myths related to both women’s and men’s sexuality."
#7QUESTION: Do you randomly get sexually aroused in public for no reason at all like men? And if so, does it die down quickly?
ANSWER 1: Yes to random arousal. It depends on the situation for how fast it dies down. Sometimes, I get randomly horny at work and then just sit there and fantasize about raunchy things. It takes longer to die down that way.
ANSWER 2: It's not an issue because we don't get erections, but it's a bit awkward when my p*ssy has a heartbeat. Our genitalia can get swollen when we're really aroused, so there is more blood down there, just like more blood in an erect penis. And it throbs, like a heartbeat.
Image credits: Zenith_K
#8QUESTION: I know this is going to seem weird but how do you guys control your pee stream? It’s easy as a guy but I’m not too sure it would be for a woman? Idk it’s a stupid question but i would be happy if I got an answer
ANSWER 1: Direction? No. Flow speed? Yes.
ANSWER 2: One of the times I had to pee outside, I did the 'pre pee' to make sure I was angled right and all seemed fine. I upped the flow speed, the angle changed massively, and it was like a broken sprinkler. Thankfully, my shoes were waterproof.
ANSWER 3:I think it’s the same pelvic floor muscles that men have. When you contract/relax your muscles to regulate your pee, it’s at the base, right? As in, you cut the flow off at the faucet, not at the end of the hose. Women just have a faucet, but no hose. You, too, can do Kegels to strengthen those muscles.
Image credits: Foxy_genocid3
#9QUESTION: What are some things that contribute to a dead bedroom in a long term relationship and what might men do to resolve those issues? (Turn you on, make it more enjoyable for you, etc)
I just want everyone to feel sexually desired again.
ANSWER 1: A BIG problem for women is having to take care of the man, house, and responsibilities. If a woman has to nag or mother you, that's a turn off. If she has to pick up after you, do all the cooking, cleaning and grocery shopping, remind you of plans, remind you of appointments, ask you to do things without you knowing you should do them, or beg you to makes plans for once instead of saying "I don't care, what do you want to do?" you are heading for dead bedroom. If you treat her like a roommate or employee instead of someone you love, respect and appreciate, dead bedroom. If the only time you show her affection is when you are horny, she will resent you and dead bedroom.
ANSWER 2: Don’t ask her to make you a list of what she wants done to show you’ll “help” around the house. You are a grown-ass man living in a home. Assuming she’s got her hands full with a job or kids and isn’t sitting around waiting for nail polish to dry, open your eyes or do some research into what it takes to make a household run and just start carrying your own weight. If you’re a partner, you’re more than a helper.
Image credits: Organic-Ad9474
Many of the questions that the men of Reddit asked had to do with women’s anatomies, periods, and relationship dynamics. These are questions that would be difficult to ask someone in person, unless they’re a very close and trusted friend.
Unfortunately, this ignorance about how women’s bodies work has profound negative effects on a global scale. Fortune notes that the gender health gap exists because the trials for drugs and medicine are mostly conducted on men. This leads to the overprescription of medicine to women which in turn has negative effects on their health.
“To this day, we don’t truly know how women metabolize and react to many medicines, why some adverse reactions are more common in women, nor how women experience or manifest pain. The efficacy, dosage, and side effects of many drugs were never tested on women,” Fortune writes.
#10QUESTION: Bro how do we become friends with yall. Theres some people I've only talked to a few times but I feel like we could have the dopest of friendships. Like no romantic stuff or couple stuff but like we can play smash bros all day
ANSWER 1: You'll be surprised how much we crave strictly platonic friendship with a guy, because most of the time men end up having ulterior motives. Just treat us like your friend, and
hope you don't get misunderstood.
ANSWER 2: If she seems hesitant, you can just tell her outright that you're just looking for friendship. Also, inviting her to a group thing instead of one-on-one can help keep expectations platonic.
Image credits: __TuCo__
#11QUESTION: Ok I go to the gym and see women wear these sports bras that have like 10 straps. While I think that is a cool style I wonder how they put it on and not get tangled in the straps!?
ANSWER 1: Totally get tangled in them sometimes, but you initially kind of bunch them together.
ANSWER 2: I hold all the straps with my thumbs, stick my head through, and hope for the best.
Image credits: throwawayjt2022
#12QUESTION: What can we safely compliment? Are all things related to appearance off limits?
ANSWER 1: Compliment things that are choices, not things that aren’t.
ANSWER 2: They're not off limits, but it's all about context and phrasing. Here are some good rules of of thumb:
Compliment what women wear instead of how they wear it.
Try mention things they chose and have control over.
Don't mention being attracted to something you've complimented them about.
ANSWER 3: Don't compliment someone you work with on their body, it seems like you are hitting on them. Things that are off limits include "great legs", "that dress fits your body well", "you have a cute smile" etc. Can easily come off creepy.
Compliment them on something they chose e.g. "that haircut looks cool", "I like your earrings", "you have a great sense of style", "you are always in a happy mood, it brings the energy of the room up" etc.
Image credits: VMey
On an individual level, there is nothing wrong with admitting that you might not know everything there is to know about women. Being humble, open-minded, and open to learning new things should be celebrated, not frowned upon. The women of Reddit answered the men’s questions without judging them for their knowledge gaps. If you shame someone for their ignorance, you only make them defensive, not more keen to learn and improve.
Besides the fear of being judged, another thing that could explain these men’s knowledge gaps is sub-standard sex education at school and at home. It falls to teenagers’ teachers and parents to dispel any myths about reproduction, anatomy, and relationships.
If they fail to do that, the students will simply absorb any and all hearsay on these topics, whether they hear it in person or read about it on some weird internet forum. It’s best to tackle these topics in the classroom, without stigma or judgment. The long and short of it is that sex ed lessons need to be better: they need to be relatable and informative, not just detached and scientific.
#13QUESTION: How do you remember that annoying thing we did that one time 6 years ago, why did you just bring it up?
ANSWER: Because it was deeply hurtful to me and you brushed it off or weren't completely honest with me about it. I know it and I want the whole truth, or I want you to acknowledge my feelings. Some combination of these things probably.
Image credits: shanster925
#14QUESTION: Do women prefer men to be open and direct about their intentions when dating or is there necessity for nuance, subtle signals and such? Like for instance, is it better for men when getting to know a woman they are interested in to say “Hey I like you. I’d love to take you out on a date sometime.” versus being nice and kind of playing a game where both parties try to figure out if the other person likes them. Probably not the best wording but I hope it’s clear enough to understand the idea of what I’m asking.
ANSWER 1: Clarity is generally better, although I'm certain there are women out there who prefer the back and forth and trying to figure it out. I'd always prefer it if someone made their intentions clear — that way there's no room for accidentally leading anyone on or missing signals.
ANSWER 2: Clarity is always preferred, but maybe filter intensity. I like knowing where we stand; I like knowing your intentions and that it isn't just me. I don't like knowing that after four dates you're falling in love.
ANSWER 3: I always thought I preferred men to give me subtle hints instead of being open and direct about their intentions. I found it more fun that way, or at least I thought. And then I met my fiancé, who was very direct about what he wanted. After our first date, he said “I really like you and I would like to see where this goes” followed by “Just so you know, I don’t date to fuck. I date to marry.” I have never been more attracted to somebody before after hearing those words. The maturity and the confidence almost made me orgasm right then and there.
Image credits: SenatorTom97
#15QUESTION: Is it true a woman actually keeps at least two pairs of granny panties? I was told every woman at least does
ANSWER: I know I have some older ugly underwear for shark week. They aren't tight on your bloated stomach and if they get stained it doesn't matter
Image credits: RapidCorrus
One woman anonymously shared how sex education works in her country during an earlier interview with Bored Panda.
"They called away all the girls from classes, brought us to an auditorium to discuss periods and what they are, why they happen, what we should do. They gave us packets of pads and told us to keep them in our lockers for emergencies. Their heart was in the right place, but by only asking the girls to attend this, they ensured that periods became some sort of mythical and curious event in the minds of all the boys," she told us.
"[The boys] were not educated, they remained ignorant to what should be essential information to them. And of course, we all scrambled to hide our pads because we all thought we would rather be caught dead than holding a packet of them. They teased us about it and we, being only 11, had nothing to say to defend ourselves because the stigma around periods is very strong in my country."
#16QUESTION: Do your guys' backs actually hurt if you have big... you know.
ANSWER: Mine does. Went from a C cup to an F cup in 6 months (on hormones for a gynecological condition). My back is so sore now! Properly fitting bras help a lot though.
Image credits: TriforceHero626
#17QUESTION: The good Ole classic question. Does size matter?
ANSWER 1: Yes. Too big is a letdown for me. Eliminates more than half of positions, intensity, and how hard I can go. That being said, I would not break up with a wonderful man just because of his d*ck size.
ANSWER 2: No. Different strokes for different folks. The right size is the one where both of you have the best sex.
Image credits: forgetablepassenger
#18QUESTION: How do you hide your period pain so well?
ANSWER: You get used to it. Plus pain killers.
Image credits: Firemaster1577
In some cultures, there are incredibly deep stigmas surrounding periods. "I have friends whose own parents make them sit on mats on the floor when they are on their periods because they are considered impure and should not touch anything in the house," the woman told us earlier.
"Some women aren't allowed to enter the kitchen or the prayer room, they're not allowed to leave the house. A majority of women in my country have no access to pads or tampons and use cloth which causes infection and prevents them from being able to earn a living. I could go on and on about how bad it is here for a lot of women," she said.
"There's no shame in it if you're 30 and have misconceptions about periods. It is sad that you may not have educated yourself about it, but there's absolutely no shame in asking women to educate them or to start reading online themselves. Sex ed is so important.”
#19QUESTION: Do you guys like it when men show vulnerability?
ANSWER: YES YES YES! It’s important that we normalize men showing emotions and accepting that it’s okay to be vulnerable.
Image credits: SlenderBacon449
#20QUESTION: Many women always smell pleasant. Like noticeably pleasant. In comparison, guys either smell bad or neutral. Is this an active choice to always smell good? Do you try to make yourself smell noticeably good all the time?
ANSWER: I think women's products in general have nicer smells. There's a popular joke about women's body products having scents like 'gentle mist of meadow,' 'tropical heavenly paradise,' and 'sparkling champagne dreams.' Meanwhile, men's are 'FROST. BLAST. SPORT. OIL CHANGE. GUN.
Image credits: OSUfirebird18
#21QUESTION: Do all ladies use tons of toilet paper or is it just the women ive dated?
ANSWER: Considering we’d need them for both pee, poop, and during periods, then yes
Image credits: Lookingforawayoutnow
#22QUESTION: When you're platonic friends with a man, do you want to be treated exactly how he treats his male friends (in terms of tone, the inside jokes, and the way time is spent), or is there an expectation to be treated differently as a woman?
ANSWER 1: I just want to be approached naturally, and not much differently than you would approach a male friend. In my personal experience though, I do expect more boundaries when it comes to sex jokes or physical contact. Otherwise, please treat a female friend like any other friend and respect what she says she is comfortable with.
ANSWER 2: I tell men that are struggling with women that they should treat women like they're there friends gf or something like that. I know plenty of guys that are great friends with a number of women cause in their heads those women are off the table for one reason or another. The second there's a possibility of dating or sex involved they are incapable of acting like normal humans. It's crazy to me.
Image credits: Slarien
#23QUESTION: why do some of you women lie about being upset?
like when i ask my gf whats wrong when she is clearly upset she usually says nothing. why?
ANSWER: Sometimes it’s because I know I shouldn’t be upset and really don’t want to be and don’t want to burden my partner with my annoying feelings. Sometimes it’s because I’m still mad and feel like stewing a little longer. Often it’s because I’ll cry if we get into the problem and I don’t want to lose the fragile illusion of control I’m fooling myself with lol.
Image credits: shadowsquid2608
#24QUESTION: What do all of you women talk about in the bathroom? When you all leave together for a couple minutes, we're left in mystery.
ANSWER: Most of the time it's nothing important. We just continue the conversation that was happing before we went in. Like no joke, I literally went with friends to go to the bathroom, and the only thing we talked about was pretzels.
Image credits: Yup_Faceless
#25QUESTION: Do girls expect to be kissed? Like she’s dropping mad hints that she’s into me but I’m nervous to make a move over fear that it’s not what she wants
ANSWER: If you’re picking up hints but you’re not sure, I’d ask “can I kiss you?” as smoothly as possible and she’ll clarify whether that’s okay or not. If she’s offended by you asking for consent, she’s immature and that’s not on you.
Image credits: shawnglade
#26QUESTION: How did you deal with going from looking like a child to getting sexual attention in a rather short period of time? Did you expect it?
ANSWER 1: I first was sexually harassed by strangers at 12 years old, before I knew anything about it. I was a child, and looked it. I don't mean to be a 'negative Nancy,' but it's very prevalent, and almost everyone I've talked to has a similar story. Sometimes even younger.
ANSWER 2: Girls receive sexual attention before they understand what it is. We have to catch up mentally to what is happening. When you're too young to understand, it can feel nice to get attention, especially as boys tend to get more attention at school up to that point. But as you learn to understand why you're getting the attention, what those men actually want, and how little you could do to stop them if they decide to just take action, it becomes frightening.
ANSWER 3: The second I turned 18, I had several guys in their late 20s trying to hook up. There is no mental switch that happens between 11:59 and 12:00 on your birthday, and it was really hard to process the fact that it wasn’t a pedophilic situation because in my head, I honestly still felt 14. I wish 18 wasn’t viewed as completely fair game for everyone.
Image credits: jefsch70
#27QUESTION: Do the majority of women out there prefer a man with a deeper voice?
ANSWER 1: From me and all my friends, yes. But we all agree that the voice can’t be too deep. Like there is a certain tone that’s just...perfect.
ANSWER 2: My first boyfriend and I had the same voice. I was more fine with it than he was.
Image credits: PUFFERFISH265
#28QUESTION: How soon should a guy call after asking for your number?
ANSWER 1: Next day.
ANSWER 2: Unpopular opinion but I don’t mind if I get a text a little while later that day. Actually calling seems like something to do when you make it official. Maybe that’s just me because I see phone calls as an inconvenience. The next day rule would bug the crap out of me. If I was interested in you I would want you to text me later after I gave you my number.
Image credits: IAmNotYourMouse
#29QUESTION: Does someones job or profession change how attractive you find him?
ANSWER 1: Not the specific job per se, but more whether they have passion, dedication, or interest in it. I don’t care what people do for a living, and sometimes it’s cool to hear about their day. But if someone’s complaining about feeling like they’re in a dead-end job that they’re just half-assing every day but won’t do anything about the situation, then that's a total turn-off.
ANSWER 2: As with most things, it depends on the woman honestly. If you’re into status, then yes you would definitely want someone with a high status job. If you plan on not working, same thing.
Myself and most of my girl friends are all career-oriented with advanced degrees, in jobs that are high status or high earning/high potential earners. I haven’t noticed that it matters as much for my group. We all have partners with interesting jobs and hobbies, but none of us sought men in specific fields of work. And several of us are the breadwinners to spouses with interesting and important but lower paying jobs.
Image credits: Danktanic420
#30QUESTION: Do you have "crushes" on random people you encounter that you don't really see anything developing with? Like someone you see every day but don't really talk to for whatever reason?
I don't mean in a creepy way, I mean, like, "my barista is insanely hot and I fantasize about him even though absolutely nothing is going to happen because of [several very important reasons]."
I assume this happens but have always wondered if it's more common with men.
ANSWER 1: Absolutely! This happened to me back in college when I developed a crush on a classmate and daydreamed of dating him. I also have friends who randomly call me about encounters with attractive strangers.
ANSWER 2: There's an older handsome guy in my neighborhood who rides a motorcycle. I do not know him; I know nothing about him. I sometimes find myself saying, 'Hi daddy,' when he rides by. That's not even something I say! One day, he had a lady on the back of his bike and I thought, Who's this bitch? I'm not a jealous person at all. I don't know where this impulse came from.
Image credits: Prestigious_Suit4724
#31QUESTION: How do girls with those long acrylic nails wipe themselves clean in the bathroom?
ANSWER 1: As a woman, I would also like to know the answer to the burning question.
ANSWER 2: As someone who had long nails and had to take out contacts, you learn to use your finger pads rather than your nails or finger tips. It's about angle and pressure.
#32QUESTION: For women with pierced nipples, if you get pregnant and start lactating, does the milk also come out through the piercing holes?
ANSWER: It can. Most women take their piercings out because it can be choking hazard, and then the piercing hole heals up very quickly. Also, milk comes out of several ducts at the nipple, not just one hole!
#33QUESTION: Why is it when we blush it's cute?
ANSWER 1: Because it indicates a capacity for strong feelings and someone who responds/reacts with healthy emotion.
ANSWER 2: Because it is a nice to see a man showing emotion of any kind
#34QUESTION: Do women really notice everything? I remember the things that me and my father never used to notice, my mom used to notice. Also do women have some kind of superpower to differentiate colours?
ANSWER 1: Trust a woman when she says colors don’t match. We have significantly more cones (the cells that detect color) than rods (cells that detect light/dark) than men do. Men are naturally better are seeing in the dark than women.
ANSWER 2: women are socialized to notice everything. we're supposed to have super powers and read moods and make sure everybody is doing okay, notice any little change in mood so that we can comfort it. we're supposed to notice as soon as the glass is empty so we can refill it... therefore, we are hyper aware of every time you take a sip.
It's really quite annoying being the person who notices things. I've definitely left relationships because of it.. not because I was noticing, but because they took advantage of it. Rather than doing the extra work to give 50%, they would just say that I noticed it naturally anyway so I might as well take care of those things.
#35QUESTION: When you are nearing the time of the month, can you feel it coming?
ANSWER: Sort of. I can feel pain that signals I'd better prepare.
#36QUESTION: How often do y'all wash your Bra?
ANSWER 1: The ones I wear occasionally? Pretty much after wearing it.
My favourite 2? Hardly ever. Can’t risk having them out of rotation.
ANSWER 2: Everyone's different.
I usually wear my bras 2 days maximum only if I didn't sweat in them or else I wear a different one every day and I wash them all at the end of the week.
#37ANSWER: Why when I get excited about a subject I'm passionate about, I sometimes get accused of mansplaining? Sometimes I just really like a subject and want to talk about it. I'm not being a d**k, I just suck at social cues and unfortunately most guys suck as well.I totally get the anger about the patriarchy and all that. I just really like birds and bugs.
ANSWER 1: It sometimes does come down to social cues. I think the best thing to do is to not dominate the conversation, but check in with them. For example, instead of talking about birds for 10 minutes, check in and volley the conversation — ask them if they are interested in birds, what their favorite bird is, etc. That way it is more of a conversation than a lecture.
ANSWER 2: Ask us, before you go off, how much we know. Or say something like, 'Tell me if you already know any of this,' so they won't feel as weird telling you, and you can just skip to the next point you were going to say.
#38QUESTION: I'm kind of an outdoorsman. I love everything outdoors. I live in the woods, I love fishing, I love hiking, and I love camping. I like country music, and I play the guitar. I asked a girl out in February, but she said I was "too simple".
Am I too simple? Maybe I should go from cowboy hat to ball cap
ANSWER: Not at all. Not every woman is the same, you just found one that wasn’t compatible with you and your lifestyle.
#39QUESTION: As a single dad to an 11 year old daughter, what are some things I need to be knowledgeable of as she matures?
ANSWER 1: First I want to say that by you commenting on here and asking for advice your already doing GREAT!! But I would say How periods actually work, what products to use and when as well as just being there to openly communicate with. I know its hard but as someone with parents who never talked to her about things like this, I would've loved to have a parent like you. Best of luck to you!
Also I know this is random but as she gets older just remember its easier and better to have the condom/birth control talk rather than the "Dad I'm pregnant" talk
ANSWER 2: Always knock on her door and wait for her to grant access before opening the door!!! Such awkward moments can be avoided with a little respect for privacy.
#40QUESTION: Do women get the pee shiver? I know sometimes I’ll be pissing and there’s an uncontrolled shiver as I’m finishing up. Does that happen with women at all?
ANSWER 1: Yup. I didn’t know that happened with men, too.
ANSWER2: Your body shivers to make up for the loss of heat. That's why you shiver more when you pee more.
#41QUESTION: Do women like booty on guys ? (I go to gym and don't wanna have a big butt)
ANSWER1: I LIKE THE CAKE BABYYYYY ? it just can’t be bigger than mine
ANSWER 2: It’s not something I look for particularly but I think a dude with a pretty flat a*s is not my thing for whatever reason.
#42QUESTION: Do you prefer dad bods, full-on jacked muscles, or jacked but not too jacked?
ANSWER 1: I like healthy-looking guys. Personally, I find jacked guys unattractive. I feel like it mainly impresses other guys. It's not pleasant getting hugged; it's like a rock wall. Honestly, if you like a guy, you think his body is hot, even if maybe others don't.
ANSWER 2: Toned but cuddly if that makes sense. Like definition but with a little padding on top.
#43QUESTION: Do you want pockets in clothing?
ANSWER 1: Yes all of them
ANSWER 2: ALL of them. Literally. Pockets in shirts, hoodies, sweaters, ALL pants, multiple pockets in pants, shorts, skirts, dresses, shoes, hell- put them in socks too why not? I. Want. Pockets.
#44QUESTION: Gay waiter here. Girl, your adult boyfriend has had his headphones on the entire time you have been here (this happens constantly). From what I have picked up you’re about to graduate with a degree in nursing and he is…..working on his music career? Girl, do you literally not understand how much better you are then this? For Christ’s sake, he ordered a well done burger with only ketchup! Girl what the hell are you doing?!
ANSWER: Lmao, is this my sister in law?! Because she’s been a nurse for over 10 years and actually married this type of dude. She likes to “fix things” and never got the hint that he still doesn’t want to be fixed. She’s way too good for him, but I honestly think that he’s broken her down enough mentally to believe that she can’t live without him. So, there’s that.
#45QUESTION: Why is there an overabundance of pillows everywhere? Couches, beds. I get having one or two for comfort. But I've seen women with 5+ pillows.
ANSWER: For me, it's mostly for added and flexible comfort. In my bedroom, I have different pillows for different places and sleeping positions — large ones for sleeping, smaller for the neck when sitting up, or between the knees when sleeping, etc.
On the couch, I have them to put behind my neck, on my lap, to prop things up, for sitting on the floor by the coffee table, lying sideways, or just snuggling one for warmth while watching a movie. You'll always find a use.
Also, it looks good.
#46QUESTION: When using bathroom and you see your pad is slightly soiled, does it feel awkward having to put it back against you body?
ANSWER 1: Yes. You also suddenly feel hyper aware of the wet, soggy feeling of expelled blood being pushed back up against your bits.
ANSWER 2: If it's a longer trip to the bathroom, everything is cold and wet when you pull up your pants. One of my least favorite sensations. I typically wipe at the pad with a piece of toilet paper before pulling my pants back up to help prevent this from happening.
#47QUESTION: Like. Why are women mean in general to other women.
You’ll never see a man go, “That B***h” just for nothing. But I’ve seen women behave like that in general with each other. I really find that difficult to understand.
Apologies if I’ve offended anyone. I come with absolute peace.
ANSWER: I feel like that is a generalisation. Competitive or insecure women will do that, but not all. On the flip side; Unfortunately women act differently around other women than around men, so maybe a women calling another women a bitch is because when there's no men around to act nice in front of they are truely a bitch. Sadly guys don't often see it
#48QUESTION: Basicaly all info about how their bodies work because f**k serious sex ed.
ANSWER: There are three holes. I mean, urethra, vagina and anus. Urethra is between the clit and the vaginal opening, it's very small and it's where the pee comes from. Vaginal opening is where dicks, sex toys and tampons go in, and also where period blood, discharge and babies come out from. Anus is... well, for pooping. Very similar to male anus but inserting something inside is usually less pleasurable for girls than for men who put things inside their butts - it's because we don't have prostate.
Menstrual cycle last about 28 days. It can be a bit shorter or longer, it's something individual, but yeah, about a month. Menstrual cycle is not the same as period. It's divided to phases. Period is just one of the phases and the first day of period is the first day of menstrual cycle. Period usually lasts 3-7 days, depends on girl. Then the other phase starts etc. I won't explain it more because as a non native speaker I simply lack proper vocabilary.
Some girls have painful period cramps. Some don't. Some don't really struggle with period and don't mind going to work or even do sports while on their period. Some girls become really sleepy and are unable to do anything else than lying in bed and crying from pain. You should never say anything like "You're exaggerating, my ex/friend/mom can do X on her period, don't be a crybaby".
Girls don't get wet only while horny. Our vaginas go more or less wet depending on the menstrual cycle phase. Also the texture of discharge changes during the cycle.
Clit is a little bump on the "front" of vulva, where the labia minora (inner lips) meeet. It can be hidden by a clitoral hood (something similar to a foreskin). Some girls have shorter hoods, so the clit is always visible. Some have longer hoods to the clit is hidden. Some girls have small inner labia and some girls have big "butterfly wings" that can make it less obvious to understand where the clit is in that particular girl. We all look different down there and if you can't find the clit, because your current partners vulva looks a lot different than your previous partners vulva, just ask the girl for her. You can put her hand on your hand and just ask "show me where" or "show me how you like it". It's okay.
Vaginas shouldn't smell like fish. If they do - it's a sign of infection. Don't believe the "smells fishy" jokes and avoid making them.
STDs are not always visible. Vulva can look perfectly fine but there can still be an infection going on. Asking your partner about their latest results is fine. Using an oral tissue (?) for oral sex (eating her out) is fine too! You can get STD from oral sex, so stay safe. You can make the tissue yourself from a condom. Cut off the top part (where the "sperm container"????? is), then cut down the length so you get a latex rectangle. Put it over her vulva and you can lick safely.
Having a period means that our body released an egg to fertilise but it didn't get fertilised so body is getting rid of it. Uterus was all like "Yeaaa we gonna be a mom!!!", so she made her walls soft and prepared for growing a baby but it didn't happen. Period is getting rid of the egg and also the special lining from uterus walls. It takes some time. We can't hold in the period or just "pee it out" on one sitting.
idk what else to add
#49QUESTION: When a bulge is visible through shorts or sweatpants, do women find that attractive or disgusting?
ANSWER: Depends, if it’s my boyfriend I find it attractive, if it’s random men on the street or on tiktok then I find it cringey and gross
#50QUESTION: How comfortable are bras ? Do you think it would be better if u had one that was customized to your eh how do u say it ( boob shape ) ? If yes how much better would that be on a scale of 1 to 10
ANSWER: I well fitted bra can feel like you're not wearing anything at all, unfortunately those are rare and expensive. Also, your body changes constantly. If you're on your period, your breasts might become larger and painful so your usual bra might not be comfortable.
I think this is why a lot of women opt for sports bras! It's easier, and you don't need to be measured regularly and have to buy loads of bras.
A customised bra would be amazing, preferably one that adjusted to any changes.
#51QUESTION: This might've been asked previously but are manboobs a dealbreaker? I'm not unfit per se, I do workout regularly but I also love food and work a desk job. So I have a dad bod and some manboobs(prob a medical condition).
Or is confidence in your body the key with women?
ANSWER 1: Manboobs are fine, just not bigger than mine... Lol
ANSWER 2: Doesn't matter a lot to a lot of women. But how it affects you does have a huge impact. If you let it knock your confidence then yeah it will affect your chances. A lot of women just want to be accepted for themselves as they are, not perfect and not looking to be pressured to be. Those women generally extend the same curtesy to partners
#52QUESTION: What's with all the plushies?
ANSWER: SO SOFT! That material they're made of is so nice on the fingertips.
#53QUESTION: After reading the topic... and actually having some pretty close friends that are women. (So now I honestly question myself why I never asked about this before) there's two questions that I wonder about.
One being the infamous friend zone. There's countless stories where the situation basically comes down to somebody wanting a boyfriend that is exactly like a friend she has. But it can't be that friend somehow. I've never really understood that one. Could one of you explain it in a bit?
The other being that sometimes you just to vent frustration. And as guys we typically want to offer solutions and fix things. Often times it results in where we have to kind of ask if you want to vent, or have a solution. But it seems the majority of time you only want to vent, leaving the situation the same. Is there any reason why you seem to want to leave the situation the same so often?
ANSWER: The friend zone question is.. I get why your asking but honestly a lot of men are friends ‘until I can f**k you’ kind of friends. Makes it hard (and super frustrating) to have/trust that you have actual friends that just want to hang.
And the second question - we often know the answer/solution, just need to vent it out. Asking if they want to vent or have a solution is a really good question.
#54QUESTION: I’m no man of Reddit but need to ask other girls/women so. Do any of u have inverted nipples? Like I only found out I have them the other week cos I thought it was normal and my brain is scrambled cos idk how common it is
ANSWER: I don't, but I work as a breastfeeding educator. About 1 in 10 women have inverted nipples.
#55QUESTION: Women, when I walk past you would you prefer that I acknowledge you or ignore you completely?
ANSWER 1: Depends, is it a dark alley at night?
ANSWER 2: Personally, I would prefer that you not acknowledge because I don’t like interacting with strangers on the street. I probably wouldn’t acknowledge you and I don’t like the peer pressure I feel to make eye contact with strangers who are trying to say hi to me. But that’s just me. Others may feel differently based on their personalities or the culture of where you are located.
#56QUESTION: Do you guys fart in front of each other the way most guys do?
ANSWER: Only if you're that comfortable enough to do so with each other. Majority don't but there's some that do. Sisters will definitely do. Friends depends.
#57QUESTION: ...what do u guys think about curved d***s....im kinda insecure and want to know if it's a turn off or not...?
ANSWER: Honestly it might look different at first but a curved penis hits spots that uncurved cannot. Which can be a wonderful thing.
#58QUESTION: I know women like confidence, but are there any women that don't? I'm not a confident person, not just because of insecurities, it's just my nature, I don't think I've ever been certain of anything in my life. I can fake confidence easily, I've been doing it for years, but I don't want to feel like I have to fake myself around someone I really care about, so how common are women that like unconfident guys?
ANSWER: I think that it's not so much a confidence that matters so much as a basic level of self-respect and not being a doormat.
#59QUESTION: So vaginal wetness is linked with arousal and increases the more aroused you are. Does that also increase with how attracted you are to the other person or is it touch and stimulation from them?
ANSWER: I want to say that you can be very aroused and still not get very wet. Sometimes your body doesn't really cooperate. For me it's a huge difference depending on my cycle. The most fertile days are... interesting. But the rest of the time the wetness is disappointing, haha.
#60QUESTION: If you’re on your period and swim in the ocean are you at all worried that you’ll have a little leak and the smell of blood will attract sharks. Because I would be.
ANSWER: I've never thought about it but I personally don't like swimming in any wild body of water which something can attack me from the dark depths.
#61QUESTION: Do you gal's enjoy going to the shops for like hours at a time, trying stuff on and looking at things you have no intention on buying? Do you get tired? Does it relax you or is it just for fun mostly? Do you prefer your SO to come or your friend/s?
ANSWER 1: I loathe and detest shopping so much, i can’t begin to describe to you how much I hate it. I gotta know what I want and a pretty direct path in the shop to its location. I use to give a friend my bra size and she would go shop around and get them for me. Ugh, f**king hate it.
ANSWER 2: I think it's super fun. We hang out, get food, try on cute clothes and sometimes buy them. It is tiring though. Online shopping is way easier
#62QUESTION: For those of you who have and wear them: What the f**k on EARTH makes you think fake eyelashes are even REMOTELY attractive?
ANSWER: If they're subtle, you legit can't even tell they're fake. The flashier ones are worn because the woman likes the look and doesn't care if others find it attractive. Even if she does care about looking attractive, people are attracted different things. Some people are totally into it even if you aren't.
#63QUESTION: Are bi men a turnoff or turnon?
ANSWER: I agree it’s neutral for me. I feel like bi men might be more understanding about lgbt/womens/poc issues since they are also a minority, so I would probably lean towards bi since they might have similar experiences to me and can understand.
#64QUESTION: Why the obsession with height? What's the magic in 6ft tall?
ANSWER: A lot of us like our partners to be taller than us but there is a limit. If you're so tall that we barely cross your waist then usually there is a drop off.
I'd say 3-5 inches taller is where a lot of girls like it